It’s been a country music on Spotify kind of day here. I’d pity my colleagues if I didn’t believe that they secretly enjoy it too. They didn’t complain, so I’m making some assumptions and running with them.
Who doesn’t love kickin’ it up on the tailgate, anyway? (I’m not 100% sure what that actually means but I’m envisioning cowboy-boot-clad-daisy-dukes-wearing-Jack-drinking dancing on the back of a pickup. I’m adding this exact activity to my bucket list right now.)
So in the name of embracing this perky genre of goodness, I started listening to the actual lyrics and have come to some conclusions.
Modern country music themes, in no particular order, according to my uber-scientific methodology of hitting ‘play’ on this list: (We’re talking current country tunes, as I realise that old school country is all about lyin’, cheatin’, heartbreak and restless hearts, typified by the superb song title ‘I Don’t Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling’.)
- Trucks – these cowboys sure do love their jalopies.
- Girls – mostly brunettes, which was a little bit interesting. All tanned.
- Whiskey – I’m concerned that country music might have a drinking problem, TBH. (Also, for the person (he knows who he is) who might object to my spelling of this particular brew, real cowboys only drink American spirits so let’s not argue on this one.)
- Highways – long long highways for late night driving. In afore-mentioned trucks. With said girls. And liquor. I’m optimistically assuming that Cowboys Against Drunk Driving is a thing.
- Corn fields – for parking the trucks up in. To drink the whiskey and make out with the girls.
- Catfish – I’m beginning to think they are a diet staple. I had to google what they look like. Not one of God’s most beautiful aquatic creatures.
- Small town pride & nostalgia – pretty sure all the pickups mentioned will have a flag or two flying proudly. Also many ‘this place is the greatest place in the world and big cities are for pansies’ emotions.
- Shakin’ it – lots and lots of shakin’ it by the girls. Sometimes in the corn fields. Usually after whiskey. And possibly a hearty meal of catfish and grits. Frequently on the back of the truck. Lit by moonlight. Is there any other way?
The most important things I have learnt from my research:
- I not-so-secretly wish I lived in a country song. I’d make an awesome country girl as per the main identified themes (But only in these ways. The amazing country girls I know and love in real life will be rolling their eyes and trying not to snort coffee out their nose as they read this, as my aversion to hard work, mud and early morning starts is well known.)
- I need cowboy boots immediately.
- It’s potentially time for a drink.
- I’m not doing nearly enough kissing in the moonlight. This shall be remedied.
Having earlier maintained that my colleagues loved my music choice, Susie did come in to my office and asked if the tune playing was the same person as the one from the song before. It wasn’t. I’m not sure I liked her attitude.
Here’s to a weekend of Barefoot Blue Jean Nights, where we Kick The Dust Up and someone special gets Drunk On Your Love. Sounds like a weekend well spent to me 🙂
P.S. In the name of research, I have found some outstanding country music song titles. They’re old school but you can’t help but have mad respect for the writers of:
- Get Off the Table, Mabel (The Two Dollars is for the Beer)
- Hand me the Pool Cue and Call Yourself an Ambulance
- Here’s A Quarter (Call Someone Who Cares)
- I Spent My Last Ten Dollars on Birth Control and Beer
- Legendary Chicken Fairy
- My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him